Non-member parents of member children

Hi- I apologize in advance for the length of this post. I searched the forum for my answer and found partial answers for the situation we have in our ward, yet I remain confused as to what to do.

Recently, a family moved into our ward. the legal parents are non-members. The wife was previously married to a member of the church. They had two boys (currently 8 and 9 years old). The boys were baptized in their biological (member) father's ward days before they family moved into our ward with their biological mother and step father. I was able to get the boy's records in our ward without a problem.

From a post to this forum I learned that I need to assign the older boy as the head of household and add his younger brother to that new household. I did that.

The parents (again, non-members) consented to have us create non-member records for them for contact information, etc. What's more, the wife has asked to have home and visiting teachers and accompanies her boys to church most Sundays (yes...we are hoping that she will be baptized someday soon). So, now I have two households-- one comprises the two non-member parents with the husband as the HoH and one that comprises the two boys.

This seems odd to me. Have I done this correctly? What is the advised way to handle this situation with regards to the households?

I am sure there exists similar situations in other wards, so I am hoping someone can shed some light on how the household and membership records should be handled.

Thanks!

Since the non-member parents consented to have temporary records created, I think I'd place the boys as children of this non-member couple.

The MLS help file does say "For example, you could create a record for a nonmember spouse or parent of a member." It doesn't seem logical to me that if you're allowed to create a non-member parent record that you would have to place them in a separate household.

I realize that conflicts with that we're told in the Head of Household section, but it does address this situation where we have permission to create non-member parent records.

RussellHltn wrote:I realize that conflicts with that we're told in the Head of Household section, but it does address this situation where we have permission to create non-member parent records.

What you described sounds right. I see no conflict at all. After all, the Head of Household section of the MLS Help file simply says that "In MLS, the head of the household is usually the husband or father, whether he is a member of the Church or not. In certain cases the head of household may also be another member parent, a single adult member, or a member child whose parents are not members" (emphasis added). The "usually" clause would certainly override the "may" clause.

The MLS Software Manual describes how to create nonmember records on page 12. If you follow the instructions in the section "If the nonmember is a relative of a member but not the spouse of a member" you will end up with one household, with the nonmember parents and the member children.

I think you're looking at a different write-up then I am.

Membership Policies > Head of Household
"The head of a household should be the member to whom all the other household members are tied in the records, usually a member parent. A single adult member or member child whose parents are not members should be his or her own head of household."

This is from the help file in 3.1.5. If I were to take a linguistic analysis, "should" would overrule "may" or "usually".

It's the second sentence that triggered my remarks in the prior post.

RussellHltn wrote:I think you're looking at a different write-up then I am.

Membership Policies > Head of Household
"The head of a household should be the member to whom all the other household members are tied in the records, usually a member parent. A single adult member or member child whose parents are not members should be his or her own head of household."

This is from the help file in 3.1.5. If I were to take a linguistic analysis, "should" would overrule "may" or "usually".

It's the second sentence that triggered my remarks in the prior post.

I was also quoting from the MLS 3.1.5 help file -- specifically "Nonmember Record-Head of House" which is giving specific advice for a nonmember record. This section seems much more germane to the situation at hand than the more generic section you quoted.

I would agree that your reading of that one section would imply that there is a conflict, but since the more specific section gives better guidance, I would follow that specific guidance. I can reconcile the apparent conflict by taking the counsel of the more generic section to apply to a child with nonmember parents where the nonmember parents have no record in MLS.

In any case, there is sufficient justification in the MLS help file for creating one household with nonmember parents and member children, if that is what the bishop determines is best for the family.

Could it be that you're talking about two different Heads of Household - one for the official membership record and one for the local MLS database?

Greggo wrote:Could it be that you're talking about two different Heads of Household - one for the official membership record and one for the local MLS database?

I don't know as there is a difference. Barring a computer problem, I don't think the two can be out of sync.

RussellHltn wrote:I don't know as there is a difference. Barring a computer problem, I don't think the two can be out of sync.

I'm referring to the H of H who appears on the official printout of one's record, where instead of the address, it states who the person resides with (and who's record a new ward will request when requesting the records for the whole family). This can't be a nonmember, as there is no official record - a nonmember's record only resides in the local MLS database.

Greggo wrote:I'm referring to the H of H who appears on the official printout of one's record, where instead of the address, it states who the person resides with (and who's record a new ward will request when requesting the records for the whole family). This can't be a nonmember, as there is no official record - a nonmember's record only resides in the local MLS database.

Interesting. I the test data they show up as in summery view "Household Member 1".

I think we're talking about the same - the way it appears in the directory and other print outs normally distributed.

So which is the correct answer?

Non-member mother is being taught by missionaries, but is unmarried to father... the two 10yo boys have been baptized and come every week, but are definitely not heads of household.

Can we create a non-member record for the mother, so that she can be tracked with ministering, etc.?

This thread is from 15 years ago. Policies have changed since then (as well as the tools). Currently, you can't create a non-member record - at all.

More information can be found in Make Changes to Member Households

Until the mother is baptized, the children will be in a household by themselves. As to which one should be the HOH, I'm not seeing any direction. I'd pick the oldest child.

jayvee7777 wrote: Wed Mar 12, 2025 11:58 amCan we create a non-member record for the mother, so that she can be tracked with ministering, etc.?

The practice of creating records for nonmembers was discontinued nearly a decade ago.

jayvee7777 wrote: Wed Mar 12, 2025 11:58 am Non-member mother is being taught by missionaries, but is unmarried to father... the two 10yo boys have been baptized and come every week, but are definitely not heads of household.

Then who is the head of household now? A nonmember cannot be a head of household; but a child of nonmember parents can be.
The Help Center article Make Changes to Member Households specifically addresses who is to be the head of household. For this situation the article states;

Head of Household
The head of household is the person to whom all other household membership records are tied. Usually, the member husband or father is the head of household. In certain cases the head of household may also be another member parent, a single adult member, or a member child whose parents are not members. The membership record numbers (MRNs) of all other household members are grouped to the MRN of the head of household. (Emphasis added)

Sorry Russellhltn; I didn't see your post until after I made mine.